I invented my own cheeseburger and I’m damned proud. I was going to call it “the Nolan Burger,” but that sounds too much like the “nothing burger” of today’s political parlance. Then I was going to call it “the Roanoker,” but there is actually a restaurant here by that name. (I could swear one of the local sandwich shops also has a sandwich called “the Roanoker” — maybe McAlister’s?)
So it’s the Cheese Bukowsi. (I’d like to think old Charles would be happy with that.)
Here’s the recipe:
- Begin cooking only after sleeping late. “Never get out of bed before noon.”
- Fry a burger only until it’s somewhat rare.
- Fry some thinly sliced hamsteak alongside the burger in the same pan. Cook the hamsteak until it’s crispy and well done.
- Drape the hamsteak over the burger, and add two thick slices of Muenster cheese. (If available, make it Boar’s Head brand.)
- If the grease in the pan sizzles and pops to burn your hand, just grin and bear it. ““What matters most is how well you walk through the fire.”
- Offer to cook them for your buddies. Because they’re pretty chill.
- Enjoy! Chillax for a bit before moving on to the day’s tasks. ““My ambition is handicapped by laziness.”
Remember to carry out all of the above with STYLE, God damn it!!!!! “To do a dull thing with style — now that’s what I call art.”