The off-brand knock-off of Dr. Pepper is named “Dr. Perky” and, for some reason, that is very, very sad.

One of my Mary Washington College alums suggested that “Dr. Pervy” would be a catchier name, but I’m already using that for my Match.com profile name.

Do I LOOK any perkier?  I’m feeling more chagrined that I bought a 12 pack of this, even if it was only $2.35.  It tastes like water, sugar, and just a touch of peppermint-flavored cough syrup.