Me: “No.”

“But you look like one!”  [He’s been staring at me with his mouth agape for at least seven minutes.]

Me: “James Woods.”

“Is he on TV?”

Me: “I don’t know.”

“Who?”

Me: “James Woods.”

Clerk at counter (joking): “Ohhhhh, Mr. Woods.  So nice of you to visit us today.  Don’t worry — we won’t tell anyone your secret.”

At this point in my life, I’d be disappointed if this didn’t happen at least once every couple of months.