I came a bit too close for comfort just now with the skunk who lives around my street, Leonardo da Stinki. I can usually saunter right by animals without them even noticing me, which I suppose is sort of a weird trait, or maybe a really boring X-Men mutant power. Leonardo and I both sort of stumbled upon one another, halted abruptly, and made some awkward eye contact. (It’s like running into your ex at Costco.)
He thankfully ambled off, after I oafishly backpedaled. (I can do oafish really well and with precisely zero effort; that’s another one of my superpowers.) I’d like to think we had a tacit exchange:
“I don’t want any drama tonight, do you?”
So there was no odoriferous outcome, and I’m grateful for that. Leonardo has gotten quite big now that he is an adult, and I’m sure his own special abilities have correspondingly magnified. (Why is there no skunk-themed member of The X-Men, anyway? That feels like a creative oversight.)
I really want to snap a picture of him, because my aspirations in life make sense only to me, and he was crossing a well lit yard during his exit. But this is The South, and I’m not sure how the average Roanoker might react if they discovered a weird, New York liberal taking pictures their property at night. I have a feeling that’s a story that doesn’t end well.
By Twitter, CC BY 4.0, https://commons.wikimedia.org/w/index.php?curid=77807699