Tag Archives: 2016

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A tiny review of “Independence Day: Resurgence” (2016).

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They had 20 years to develop a sequel for “Independence Day: Resurgence” (2016) — 20 years after the original “Independence Day” exploded into theaters, defining the 1990’s summer blockbuster.  You figure that’d be enough time to come up with a really cool script.

Maybe there was one — maybe they had a really great screenplay that was thrown out for some reason at the very last minute. (Political correctness?  Copyright issues?  Internal studio politics?)  Then this by-the-numbers, live-action “G.I. Joe” cartoon was hastily thrust in front of the cameras.  What we’ve got here is really just a lot of common tropes strung together by a thin story, performed by cliche stock characters.  The charm, surprises, humor and impact of the (admittedly silly) original film are entirely absent here.

Don’t get me wrong.  “Independence Day: Resurgence” isn’t quite as bad as some other reviewers might make it seem.  There’s some fun to be had, especially if the kid in you still gets a kick out of gooey aliens.  (The ending sequence was enjoyable.)

It’s just disappointing because it’s quite average.  I’d give it a 6 out of 10, and I’d caution you to wait until you pay a dollar for it at Redbox.

Postscript: given what the movie reveals as their goal, why don’t the aliens just nuke us from orbit?  Ellen Ripley is smarter than an entire alien race.

 

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A few quick words on “Train to Busan” (2016)

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Everything you’ve heard about “Train to Busan” (2016) is indeed correct; it’s a first-rate South Korean zombie film that fans of the genre won’t want to miss.  I’d give it a 9 out of 10.

It’s maybe a little campier than I expected, with some over-the-top zombies that feel more reminiscent of the “Evil Dead” films than George A. Romero’s movies or Robert Kirkman’s work.  It’s also a bit long at nearly two hours — if I were editing it, I would have swapped out some of the time devoted to car-to-car melees with additional scenes showing what’s transpired beyond the train.  Imagine how a skilled screenwriter could further expand on the (really cool) train station plot points we already see … what if the train was forced to stop at every station?  What if it couldn’t stop?  What if its passengers were turned away at safe areas?  What if desperate stragglers tried to board the train?

This was a good one, people.  Check it out.

 

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Ballston, Virginia, September 2016

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This is the major professional and commercial area of Ballston, an affluent section of Arlington, Virginia.  These were taken near the Virginia Square Metro Station; just north of George Mason University.  (Do college students eat frequently at these upscale cages and gourmet delis?  When I was going to school in Fredericksburg, we splurged when we went to Olive Garden after a formal.)

Also just a few blocks away is the Defense Advanced Research Projects Agency (DARPA).

 

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Warrenton, Virginia, Labor Day Weekend 2016 (3)

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All The Pretty Horses!  (That’s a James Patterson reference, by the way.)

This pretty girl took a shine to me instantly.  (I was surprised, as I thought horses were generally shy around strangers.)  I wanted so badly to pet her, but I elected not to cross onto this person’s property in order to do so.  I am told Southern people take certain things very seriously — and two of them are property lines and Second Amendment rights.

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This eastern rat snake (or northern black racer?) elected to join our party, or he at least ventured near it, where he was expertly plucked up by one of our group.  (You’ve got to lift them from just behind the head, so that they cannot bite you.)

Forget that narrow-fellow-in-the-grass bull@#$% you heard; this mamajama was KAIJU.

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Watching “Captain America: Winter Soldier” on the big screen on the side of a barn!  And then “Civil War!”

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Tinypup!!

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Warrenton, Virginia, Labor Day Weekend 2016 (2)

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FutureMacNuggets!!

One of these chickens is an enterprising bird that my friend and her family have dubbed “Adventure Chicken,” as she  frequently escapes the enclosure. Adventure Chicken actually stuck her head in my tent when I wasn’t looking.

 

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Camping at Iron Gate, Virginia, July 2016

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So the Mary Washington College alums finally shanghaied me into the annual campout at Iron Gate, Virginia (population 388).  It was amazing.

I saw a bear (on the ride home); a bald eagle; cows and horses; huge snorting hogs and friendly little piglets (hoglets?); a bat; a glittering blue-tailed skink; a wrinkly, red-faced turkey buzzard (up close); finger-length iridescent blue dragonflies; and innumerable wildflowers.

We smelled skunks too — several times along the way and once downtown in neighboring Clifton Forge.

This was all in the company of some amazing friends, schoolmates and their families — a couple of whom I haven’t seen in nearly a quarter century.

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Approaching Iron Gate via Clifton Forge and the Allegheny Mountains in southwest Virginia.  What you see is not fog — these mountains are high enough so that the road runs parallel with the clouds.

 

The Cowpasture River and its vicinity.

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Camp Nolan.  The bat is for bobcats or The Blair Witch.

 

The magic bacon-creating creatures of legend!!!

 

I made friends with these adorable bacon beans!  After I called them, they decided they liked me and tried to follow me out! I wanted to adopt one and name him “Delicious.”

 

Accidental overhead abstract mountain shot is creepy as f#%k.  I’m pretty sure this is the last thing a murder victim sees …

 

The first fireworks photos I’ve ever taken that have actually turned out.  I am 43 years old.

 

 

 

 

 

 

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A very short review of “The Shallows” (2016)

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“The Shallows” (2016) is a pretty good beach-themed horror thriller — it’s just overrated.  I’d give it an 8 out of 10, and I’d easily recommend it to somebody looking for a decent, conventional scary movie.  But I don’t think it lives up to the hype.

The movie works.  The scares are there and, for the most part, they are stylishly and artistically rendered.  I jumped a couple of times.  My friends keep comparing it with “Jaws” (1975) or “Deep Blue Sea” (1999), but it really has more in common with the “Open Water” films of the early 2000’s.  It’s a competently made, slow-burn horror movie with a man-vs.-nature plot setup that could happen in real life.

But I doubt that “The Shallows” truly belongs on anyone’s must-see list, and I don’t plan on watching it twice.  The story is a little thin.  The movie feels padded with lengthy establishing shots and surfing sequences, and a belabored emotional backstory that feels tacked on.  (I think this easily could have been an hour-long film.)  The final action sequence is a little cartoonish, too.  (C’mon.)

I’m also perplexed by critics’ praise for lead actress Blake Lively’s performance.  To me, it seemed really poor.  (The exception is her reaction shots — she shined when she was reacting to offscreen threats.)

Anyway, do check it out.

 

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A Monet Independence Day?

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Every time I try to photograph fireworks, they invariably look like impressionist paintings.

At some point, it would probably be a good idea for me to learn about photography.

 

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I saw my first bald eagle this July Fourth weekend!

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What better way to spend the July 4th weekend than seeing a bald eagle for the first time, just two miles from George Washington’s house?  That’s like spotting Santa on Christmas Eve, or killing your first vampire on Halloween, or maybe having rabbit stew for Easter, right?

I do realize that you readers cannot see the eagle, as it is only a tiny speck above the George Washington Memorial Parkway in Mount Vernon in the first picture below.  I was too excited at first to snap a picture, and those birds fly fast.

I realize that I have posted before about spotting an eagle for the first time in the hills around my home.  But my Virginian friends have explained to me that, based on my description of that bird, it was probably a condor.

We also saw the eagle in its nest across the parkway, and could hear the cries of both the bird and its mate.  They nest there because they dive for fish in the Potomac River.

 

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Happy Fourth of July!!

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I am spending it with some terrific friends here in Mount Vernon.  They actually live on property that was once owned by George Washington — the road out front is one he probably traveled on so long ago.

I am such a terrible photographer that I haven’t even mastered my camera’s zoom function.  But if you squint really hard, you can just about make out a deer at center by the woods in the last photo.

 

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