Have you heard of the new “Trump Combo” at Burger King?

It’s a hamberder, a cup of covfefe (served smocking hot), and a side of lies.

(You could also substitute orange soda for the drink, if you want.)

[Update: a couple of clever pals of mine on Facebook suggested that we should also include word salad and Cheetos. ]

 

He DID say that Mexico would pay for the wall outright.

This article from the Washington Post shows a letter from the Trump Campaign to Robert Costa and Bob Woodward, dated 2016.  Click the link below and read the letter on its original letterhead.

Donald Trump indeed indicated that he expected Mexico “to make a one-time payment $5 to $10 billion” to pay for the wall.

(Seriously. He did say it.)

 

 

“When I said Mexico would pay for the wall … obviously I never meant Mexico would write a check.”

“The past was alterable. The past never had been altered.

“Oceania was at war with Eastasia. Oceania had always been at war with Eastasia.  A large part of the political literature of five years was now completely obsolete. Reports and records of all kinds, newspapers, books, pamphlets, films, sound-tracks, photographs — all had to be rectified at lightning speed. Although no directive was ever issued, it was known that the chiefs of the Department intended that within one week no reference to the war with Eurasia, or the alliance with Eastasia, should remain in existence anywhere. ”

— from George Orwell’s “Nineteen Eighty-Four”

 

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Mr. President, please stop smocking the covfefe.

The first step is admitting that you have a literacy problem.

So, the moral of the story is … “Dont tweeet while smocking teh hard stuf?”

It’s so weird having a president that consistently resembles the former character in those old “Goofus and Gallant” comic strips.

Oh god, I probably just dated myself with that reference.

 

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(It’s worse than the “Gilligan’s Island” theme.)

That awkward moment when you’re arguing with a Trump supporter online about a false dichotomy, and you type “Hillary’s hypothetical guilt does not exonerate Donald.”

And then it gets stuck in your head, because it sounds like the start of the most weird-ass haiku ever.