Tag Archives: Eric Robert Nolan

“Fear the Walking Dead,” but Crave the Next Episode!

The pilot of AMC’s prequel to its little known zombie tv show was just great!  I’d give it a 9 out of 10.

It looks as though “Fear the Walking Dead” will be a smartly scripted horror drama with relatable, realistic, three-dimensional characters — something I think “The Walking Dead” has often stumbled with.  (Other fans strongly disagree, of course.)  The cast was quite good across the board — but especially Frank Dillane, whose performance as a heroin addict with tragic recognition was just outstanding.   And “Fear” shows fans of the zombie horror sub-genre exactly what the vast majority of movies fail to examine — what happens when an epidemic is in its infancy.  No, there are none of the zombie “swarms” that are the bane of Rick Grimes and company, but the “slow burn” horror here delivers nicely.

I am on board with this.

Hey … when Dillane’s addict character starts screaming at the character of “Gloria” in the abandoned church, am I the only one who started humming Laura Branigan’s “Gloria?”

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My take on the ambiguous ending for John Carpenter’s “The Thing.” (Major spoilers.)

John Carpenter’s 1982 tour-de-force, “The Thing,” is arguably the best horror movie of the decade.  It paid little attention to the movie it ostensibly remakes, the standard, boilerplate, flying-saucer Saturday-matinee of “The Thing From Another World” (1951). It presumably paid greater attention to its real and far darker source material, “Who Goes There?,” John W. Campbell Jr.’s 1938 horror-sci-fi novella.

One of the things the movie’s fans still debate heatedly is its bleak ending — I think it goes beyond ambiguous to downright mysterious.  Viewers actually are given no certainty whatsoever about who or what are actually pictured onscreen in the film’s Antarctic setting, after a fiery climax for this gory, special-effects-heavy actioner.  (Only people who have seen the film know what I am talking about.)

My own interpretation is a little less popular than the others you hear about.  To conceal spoilers, I’m sharing it after the poster image below.  [IF YOU HAVE NOT SEEN THE MOVIE, STOP READING NOW!]

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Continue reading My take on the ambiguous ending for John Carpenter’s “The Thing.” (Major spoilers.)

VOTE FOR DEEZ NUTS.

The Iowa high school sophomore is doing nothing less than pranking America’s entire electoral process.

What’s the deal with Gotham City-style pranksters popping up in the national discourse lately?  I love it.

I’d love to see Deez Nuts team up in some fashion with the Internet troll impersonating Target’s online customer service.

And don’t think that Deez Nuts is too young to be among Batman’s rouges gallery.  Anarky was a kid.  And the General (Ulysses Hadrian Armstrong) was just eleven years old.

Check out the following article:

“A 15-Year-Old Going by ‘Deez Nuts’ Is Doing Surprisingly Well in the Presidential Polls, by Carlton Ferment, Vice.com, 8/20/15:

http://www.vice.com/read/all-hail-president-deez-nuts?utm_source=vicefbus

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A review of “Extinction” (2015)

I’d give “Extinction” (2015) a 6 out of 10; it’s a fairly average postapocalyptic horror movie.  And that’s kind of sad, as it seemed to have the ingredients for a great one.

We open with a delightfully scary nocturnal ambush on two school buses crowded with fleeing refugees.  The scene isn’t perfect.  (The soldiers here are both too stoical and too stupid.)  But it’s effective thanks to its claustrophobic setup.  The assailants actually aren’t zombies or “undead” — they’re vicious, fast-moving mutants that are far more interesting.  (Their monsteryness is contagious and catches quickly, a la 2002’s “28 Days Later.”  This predictably spells disaster for the busses’ passengers.)  The animalistic albino baddies actually reminded me a lot of the creatures from “Mutants” (2009).

Then we jump ahead nine years, where two men and a nine-year-old girl suspect that they are the last of the world’s survivors.  But three people are enough for conflict, human nature being what it is.  There is a creatively conceived and fresh idea for a particularly dark end-of-the-world drama.  Jeffrey Donovan and Matthew Fox are both very good; yet the incredibly talented young Quinn McColgan outshines them both.  (Seriously, that little girl is off the hook.  Her performance might be the best thing about the film.)  The makeup effects for the monsters (here only referred to as “they” or “them”) are surprisingly fantastic for what seems like a low-budget film.  And you can tell that a nice amount of thought went into this movie, even if its understanding of Darwin is a little puzzling.  (Why would blindness be an adaptive trait for the monsters?)

I’m just not sure why this movie didn’t work so well for me.  Its formula sure as hell worked for “28 Days Later” and “Maggie” (2015).

Here’s what I think the problem was — the conflict between the two men was a plot that just never advanced.  One hates the other.  We eventually find out why, and it’s a compelling plot point, rendered fairly well in flashback.  But … it’s a static situation that just doesn’t proceed anywhere.  I actually got bored.

The monsters often did little to advance the tension.  They are usually offscreen, absent entirely, or even (in much of the movie’s beginning) presumed extinct.  My attention really did wander.

Finally, the extremely cheesy musical score detracted greatly from the tension that the movie does manage to establish.  This horror movie sounded like a Lifetime Channel movie-of-the-week.  That is not a good thing.  If only those violin players had been victims of the initial apocalypse.

Oh, well.  This is still a fairly good end-of-the-world tale.  And the creepy-crawlies were nice, when we got to see them.

extinction art

The Dude would not abide …

So an old college pal wrote to me the other day to ask for advice on which recent Stephen King novel he might check out.  He told me that he was interested in something more mainstream horror.  He said he enjoyed King more before the author “got into all the dark tower stuff and a wondering dude.”  I steered my friend away from “Joyland” and toward “Mr. Mercedes.”

But I love that typo.  A “wondering dude” immediately makes me think “The Dude” from “The Big Lebowski” wandering around Mid-world, befuddled, after accidentally stepping through an inter-dimensional door.  He’d have a “beverage” in one hand and a WTF expression on his face.

darktowerlongroad  Waste_Monsters_2

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I am trying to watch the Perseid meteor shower right now …

… and I am not seeing a DAMN thing.

The same thing happened during the last big sky event … that Blue Moon/Blood Moon/Sailor Moon/Neptune/whatever.

Why do I always suck at these things?

There’s always a silver lining.  If I can’t see the meteors, then I can’t be reduced to ash or zombified as per a crappy, overrated 1980’s horror movie, right?

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“The Unknown,” from Edgar Lee Masters’ “Spoon River Anthology”

“The Unknown”

—  from Edgar Lee Masters’ “Spoon River Anthology”

YE aspiring ones, listen to the story of the unknown
Who lies here with no stone to mark the place.
As a boy reckless and wanton,
Wandering with gun in hand through the forest
Near the mansion of Aaron Hatfield,
I shot a hawk perched on the top
Of a dead tree. He fell with guttural cry
At my feet, his wing broken.
Then I put him in a cage
Where he lived many days cawing angrily at me
When I offered him food.
Daily I search the realms of Hades
For the soul of the hawk,
That I may offer him the friendship
Of one whom life wounded and caged.


SpoonRiverAnthology

A very short review of “Cockneys vs. Zombies” (2012).

“Cockneys vs. Zombies” (2012) began with such promise — with cool, funny characters; capable comedic actors; an attempt at a decent story; and dry, witty British dialogue.  It looked like it could be a cool unauthorized companion film to “Shaun of the Dead” (2004).

Sadly, then, it didn’t pan out.  The offbeat, character-driven banter gave way to a lot of slapstick that didn’t really work for me.  And problems with pacing and tension prevented this from being an effective horror film.

I’d give this a 4 out of 10.  Oh well.

I have two questions after this film about British slang, with which I try to stay current.  (What can I say?  Some great horror movies come out of Britain.  I love it when Frank tells the crow in “28 Days Later” to “get out of it.”)

  1.  When someone gets mad at another, they call him a … mop-head?  Moppet?  Muppet?  They always say that word so fast.
  2.  If somebody says something stupid, you call them a “plum?”
kinopoisk.ru
kinopoisk.ru

550 Atari 2600 Games! Online! For Free!

Now here is a gem, courtesy of my boy Frank — Virtual Atari, where you can play (most of) your 80’s favorites right online, using your keyboard!

http://www.virtualatari.org/

The games available number at 550, and that’s pretty damned impressive, if you ask me.  There are so many that the list includes even the most questionably inspired games.  We’ve got “cartridges” for games like “Crazy Valet,” “Save the Whales” and the truly befuddling unauthorized German game, “Snail Against Squirrel.”  (Do such melees occur in real life?  I can only imagine that they would play out rather quickly.)

It’s Sunday!!  Have fun!!

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“Legionnaires’ disease outbreak kills 10 in NYC, 100 infected” (RT)

Here’s a little perspective — Legionnaire’s disease is an environmental threat and cannot be spread from person to person.  This article also quotes New York State Governor Andrew Cuomo as saying the disease typically occurs annually in more than 500 people statewide.

https://www.rt.com/usa/311904-legionnaires-disease-nyc-outbreak/