Simply put, these pens were fun as hell. Remember how cool it was to click the different colors, even if you weren’t writing or drawing anything?
Why don’t they make them anymore? iPhones be damned — I know kids these days would love these things.

Simply put, these pens were fun as hell. Remember how cool it was to click the different colors, even if you weren’t writing or drawing anything?
Why don’t they make them anymore? iPhones be damned — I know kids these days would love these things.

These were powered by a single AA battery, and made little boys everywhere quite happy on early 80’s Christmas mornings. I always thought that the nearly identical “Stompers” were a ripoff of Rough Riders. But, as it turns out, Stompers came first, in 1980.
Do NOT play the commercial below unless you want the Rough Riders jingle stuck in your head. It’s a hell of an earworm, especially if you remember it from childhood.
First grade memories … every kid in America made one of these at least once.
Happy Thanksgiving!!

If you were a little kid on Long Island in the late 1970’s and early 1980’s, then you remember Channel 9’s annual Thanksgiving monster movie marathon. Dear God, did I love watching it with my Dad. It was an EVENT. I loved it far more than any Thanksgiving turkey — if they played monster movies all day, I think I’d cheerfully just enjoy Cocoa Puffs nonstop in front of the color TV in the family’s living room.
The Holy Trinity of monster movies, of course, consisted of “King Kong” (1933), “Son of Kong” (1933) and “Mighty Joe Young” (1949). It’s a testament to these films’ staying power that they could still appeal to both children and adults roughly a half century after they were made. Retrospect suggests it was probably a nice little father-son bonding exercise … my Dad was watching me thrill to the same monster action he enjoyed as a boy. Special effects legend Ray Harryhausen truly blessed my childhood.
The DVD Drive-In website has a neat little nostalgic rundown right here:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aTuHnzGSNOs


This is just NUTS. No, I am not quite old enough to remember this late-1960’s advertisement for “Erik” cigars — I happened along a few years later. But I was named for it.
My father told me when I was growing up that he named me after hearing the name “Eric” in a cigar commercial … I guess I was just never 100 percent sure if he was kidding or not. (My parents also came very close to naming me “Christian.”) Just a few days ago, through the magic of the Internet, I finally discovered the ad itself. (Thanks to Youtube user “blegume” for uploading the vintage commercial and solving this longstanding personal mystery.)
The ad itself is actually kind of funny. It makes smoking look entirely slick and telegenic and badass, and it underscores the point metaphorically with footage of a goddam viking ship sailing around Manhattan. (That’s the Brooklyn Bridge you see in the background.)
And, in this politically correct age, the ad manages to be at least mildly offensive to two groups: women and … Scandinavians. (Its product, it boasts, is “the most interesting idea from Scandinavia since the blonde.”)
My self-esteem would be incredibly high if people started proudly proclaiming “ERIK” in the same manner as the robust male narrator. I might try to create a wav. file of that and program my laptop to belt that out randomly like twice a day. Besides, I figure it could be worse — my father could have named me “Newport Menthols” or something. (Maybe it would be fitting; I’m slim and smooth, yet ultimately hazardous to your health.)
The Kirk Douglas lookalike you see in square-jawed profile is actually a Scandinavian named “Erik,” the video’s comments section informs me. He is none other than Norwegian Erik Silju, and his credits include episodes of both “Route 66” and “Murder, She Wrote.”
Here’s the kicker, though — I found four other guys, in the first page of the comments section alone, who were also named “Erik” after their parents saw this ad. That’s gotta be some kind of record.
Life is so weird.
I really missed the boat with last week’s Throwback Thursday — it was the 50th anniversary of the entire “Star Trek” franchise, with the first episode of the original series airing on September 8, 1966. (And even the term “franchise” seems way too narrow to describe “Star Trek” in all of its incarnations — it’s really more like a permanent part of western popular culture.) I’m not old enough to remember the show’s original run, which was a surprisingly scant three years. But I remember it in syndication when I was not much more than a baby in the mid- to late 1970’s.
“Star Trek” was something that my older brother and maybe my father watched. (I was fixated on programming that was more comprehensible for young kids, like “Land of the Lost” and reruns of “The Lone Ranger.” Seriously, the original black-and-white serial western was still in reruns back then.)
But “Star Trek” was definitely something I was attracted to as a tot, doubtlessly resulting, in part, from the contagious ardor for it that I saw in my older brother. (He might not admit it today, but he was a bit of a hard-core science fiction fan long before I was.) The show was on at our tiny house in Woodhaven, Queens, quite a lot. He also had toys and posters connected with it. (And anything my older brother owned was something I endeavored to play with when he wasn’t looking.)
He had that Captain Kirk toy among the figures produced by Mego that you see in the bottom photo. (Again, 1970’s “action figures” were often pretty much indistinguishable from dolls.) In the early 1980’s, he had a totally sweet giant poster depicting diagrammed schematics for The Enterprise in surprising detail. I’ve Google-searched for it, but found only similar pinups. The one hanging in the room we shared was blue.
I remember him annoyedly correcting me because I called it “Star Track.” (I did not yet know the word “trek.” I myself was confused by my own mistake; I knew that there could be no “train tracks” in space, even if I studied the opening credits one time just to make sure.)
I was precisely the sort of pain-in-the-ass kid who fired off an incessant barrage of questions when I saw something on TV that I didn’t understand. My father was patient to a fault when I punctuated his World War II movies with inane questions. (I’m willing to bet I eventually acquired more knowledge of the war’s European theater than the average six-year-old.) My brother was not always so forbearing. I actually remember him changing the channel away from shows he was watching, like “Star Trek” or “MASH,” if I joined him at the little black-and-white television we had in our room. (The poor guy needed me to lose interest and go away, so that he could at least hear the damn show.)
Certain “Star Trek” episodes remain memorable to this day, even if I understood maybe 15 percent of what transpired onscreen. The was The One With The Domino-Face Men, which the Internet now tells me was actually titled “Let That Be Your Last Battlefield.” Then there was The One Where Kids Ruled Themselves on a Deserted World, which made a really big impression on me. (The Internet tells me this one was “Miri.”)
As I grew up, the show faded from prominence in my child’s psyche. It was just never my fandom of choice. Nor was it for many other kids I knew … by the 1980’s, it was already considered “an old TV show.” The kids on my street were always excited about the feature films; even if we were underwhelmed by the “slow” first film in 1979. Blockbuster movies were major events back then, and fewer, and they were enigmatic in a way that is impossible after the Internet’s arrival. (I think that Millennials will never be able to understand that, in the same way that you and I can never appreciate the vintage “serials” that our parents watched before the main feature at a Saturday matinee.)
In the 1980’s, just about every boy I knew was preoccupied with the space-fantasy of “Star Wars.” On television, we had cheesefests like the original “Battlestar Galactica” and “V.” As we got older, we gravitated toward the “Alien” and “Predator” film franchises. At home, I read Orson Scott Card and Harry Harrison, and as I approached college toward the end of the decade, I’d discovered Arthur C. Clarke. If we’d known another kid who was really into “Star Trek,” I’m not sure we would have considered it “nerdy.” It would just have been very weird, because it we viewed it as a campy tv show from maybe two decades prior, like “Bonanza” or something. I don’t think I ever even thought of the franchise as really relevant or popular until I was at Mary Washington College in the 1990’s. “Star Trek: the Next Generation” would regularly draw kids out of their dorm rooms into the lobby at New Hall.
Still, it’s hard not to develop an emotional attachment to something that stimulated your sense of wonder as a tot. I … felt pretty damn sad when Captain Kirk died in 1994’s “Star Trek: Generations.” I saw it in a theater in Manassas, Virginia, I think, with my girlfriend at the time. She actually felt she had to console me after seeing how doleful I was on the drive home.


No, I was never a fan of Olivia Newton John, nor am I old enough to recall her stardom in any great detail. I need to mention “Xanadu” at least once here at this blog, however, as it is forever linked in my mind with the summer of 1980.
This song was played endlessly at the beach by sunbathing teenage girls. They mostly went unnoticed by me, as this was the summer before I entered the third grade, and I hadn’t developed much interest in girls just yet. But thinking of this song immediately returns me to the beach again as a little boy. (My parents sent me there with my siblings a lot, something for which retrospect has taught me to feel thankful.)
I have a lot of memories of going to the beach in the early 80’s — burning sand, screaming for the ice cream man, and sidestepping endless arrays of discarded bottlecaps in the gravel parking lot. (The local teenagers must have done a hell of a lot of drinking there; upturned bottlecaps hurt when you stepped on them.) This was also the summer that my friend Brian’s little brother, Brad, erroneously told me that Han Solo died in “The Empire Strikes Back.” (There were no “Episode” prefixes when the first Star Wars films came out.)
There was another hit by John that can transport me back the early 80’s. That would be “Physical,” which was played and sang ubiquitously in 1981 by the girls in my fourth grade class. (I still remember Linda, who lived on the next street, talking about John in awed tones: “A looooot of people think she is beautiful.”)
But I’d prefer not to think of that song, if I can help it. While “Xanadu” is arguably still fun and catchy, “Physical” is best left forgotten.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oWeJ9p42ufg
Believe it or not, I actually can remember Blondie’s “Heart of Glass” being played in the summer of 1979. (That would have been the summer before I entered second grade.) The song came out in September 1978; but I can pinpoint the year as 1979, because this is a vivid summer memory. I heard “Heart of Glass” being played loudly on a hot day by a house halfway down the street I grew up on, and I was playing with the first Star Wars figures I’d ever gotten. (I’d adopted R2-D2 and C-3PO the prior Christmas; they lived among shuffled papers in the top drawer of the bright blue desk that Santa had also brought me.)
Blondie was a big deal. “Call Me” and “The Tide is High” were two other hits that I heard a hell of a lot as a little boy in 1980. You could guarantee those would come up at least once on the way to school on whatever radio station the bus driver played. (The little kids sat toward the front; my best friend Shawn and I had a habit of sitting in the coveted “front seat” behind the driver, who was an adult we really liked.)
If you watch the truly Kafkaesque video for “The Tide is High,” you’ll actually see an utterly bizarre homage to Star Wars, in which Darth Vader morphs into … an upright robotic rat, apparently. I am not making this up. It’s in the second video I posted.
What’s befuddling is that I don’t think I have heard Blondie played since … the very early 1980’s, I guess. Other superstars from the era occasionally get rediscovered. In 1993 and 1994, for example, the kids at Mary Washington College were hit by a horrifying revival of the truly abhorrent ABBA, not to mention a couple of “songs” from (God help us), The Partridge Family. (If you ask me, a meth epidemic would have been less troubling.)
Why not Blondie? I don’t get that.
I loved these cheap toys when I was a tot in the late 1970’s. They were a favorite gift from any aunt who might be visiting during the summer.
Some websites list these as 1960’s toys; I’m guessing the Chinese manufacturers were simply using the same molds a decade later.
I seem to remember cracking or breaking one on more than one occasion, which is weird, because they weren’t made of glass. I also needed an adult to fill them for me, when I was very little — you had to fill them via a tiny hole in the back that was plugged by a small plastic stopper. It required a little finesse, as you had to run only a thin stream of water from the faucet to make that work.
I distinctly remember that dark blue Luger that you see at the bottom.



If you were a kid in suburbia, then you both perpetrated and fell for The Ol’ Hose Trick at least once. It was a rite of passage.
And it taught you two timeless life lessons:
