Mr. President, can you ask the medical doctors to invent a disinfectant in Mountain Dew flavor or something? Some of us don’t have the means to inject it, and have to spray in it into our mouths.
And this shit tastes AWFUL.
PS — did you know that Obama could hold his breath underwater for five minutes straight?
I’m honored to share here that my poem “Lie To Me, But Brightly” was published today over at Spillwords Press. You can find it right here.
Thanks again to Editor Dagmara K. for allowing me to share my voice at this terrific online periodical.
I have some great memories of sipping ice pops and playing “Sorry!” with my best friend on his back patio after a long summer day. (I believe it was licensed by Parker Brothers in the 1980’s, and not Hasbro.) Not once did anyone ever chime in and say “sorry” during gameplay. Because that would have been weird and stupid.
DC Comics.
1) Take the number of days you’ve quarantined.
2) Add the number of times you’ve washed your hands today.
3) Divide by Covid-19.
4) Multiply by the number of typos you found in Donald Trump’s last tweet.
5) Subtract by the number of times you tried to scratch your nose through your mask today, because you are an IMBECILE.
6) Multiply by Steely Dan’s “Hey 19.”
7) Add 1984.
8) How do I love thee? (Count the ways and then add them.)
9) Divide and conquer.
10) Goto Line 10.
11) Add a hominem.
12) Explain the steps you took, it in the voice of a muppet vampire who LOVES TO COUNT.
13) Integers. Or something.
14) Cube 2: Hypercube.
15) Subtract Matchbox 20.
16) Snap your fingers wearing the Infinity Gauntlet — so that it’s perfectly balanced, as all things should be.
17) Explain the math of this to Private Rieben. (Show your work.)
18) If your answer is all mixed up by 311, you’ve got to trust your instinct and let go of regret. (You’ve got to bet on yourself now, Star. ‘Cause that’s your best bet. WATCH ME NOW.)
“His Career.” Soviet Union.
Poland.
I’m honored today to see my poem “Not of Byzantium” published by The Piker Press!
Thanks, as always, to Editor Sand Pilarski for accepting my work!
“Not of Byzantium,” by Eric Robert Nolan
Eric Robert Nolan, Author 