Uncategorized

A quick review of “Total Recall” (2012)

2 Comments

I am blogging some of my past movie reviews from Facebook; this was my take on the “Total Recall” remake.

**********

“Total Recall” (2012) was a fun, slick update of the 1990 classic; I’d give it an 8 out of 10. It can’t match the magic of the original (especially with the abandonment of one particular twist near the end), but it was still fun enough. Plus, any fast-paced, CGI-heavy, sci-fi action movie with both Jessica Biel and Kate Beckinsale really is just pure nerd fun.

Beckinsale grows on me. She’s a great actress, especially in roles that require her to be powerful or angry, and she does physical stunt-work superbly. She deserves to carry her own franchise, and I mean something better and more mainstream than the “Underworld” films.

Anyway … I’m pretty sure I have a good answer to this movie’s central mystery (as well as that of its predecessor). This is the question of whether or not everything Quaid witnesses is real. (Is he a secret agent, or is this all a fantasy generated by “Rekall?”)

It is real, and here’s why. In both movies, the viewer witnesses events that are outside of Quaid’s experience. For example, we see the police plotting to capture him and interviewing witnesses. Quaid is nowhere near these events when they occur, and does not see or hear them; therefore they cannot be part of his virtual reality fantasy. Yet you and I see them up on the screen. So they are real, within the story, and not imagined by Quaid. To me, it all seems pretty straightforward.

All in all, this was a fun ride. I recommend it.

Total-Recall-HD-Wallpapers

Uncategorized

And a college friend just authored this.

Leave a comment

No Train In Sight Or Sound

There is something sadistic about a singer in the subway singing

“I hear a train coming. It’s just around the bend”

when there obviously

is no train in sight or sound

and you have 20 minutes

to wait for the next one.

Just sayin’.

[Caveat:  this post is a joke.  I took my buddy’s Facebook status and added line breaks!]

110_Street_B_train_vc

Photo credit:  Rob Ngyuyen, “The B Train Arrives,” via Wikimedia Commons.

Uncategorized

The Mary Washington College tragedy grows sadder and more troubling …

3 Comments

… with this article from yesterday’s New York Times:

I can’t imagine how campus must have changed since I was a student.  I lived on campus for four years, and I swear I never witnessed anything like the things this article describes.  I remember “Mother’s Rugby” being an affable group of sports nuts, and nothing more.  I knew one member because we were in a class together — he was a very nice guy.  During one walk around Fredericksburg, he actually defended a couple of female companions from a few locals who were about to harass them.

I don’t even remember too much controversy on campus connected with any social or political issues.  I wasn’t aware of any organized vocal feminist community, or anyone visibly opposing feminists either.

In 1991, I think, there was some controversy connected with a … Multi-cultural Center?  I think it was an office dedicated to advocating for students who were members of racial minorities?  And when the gay students demonstrated for social acceptance, there were a few psychos wearing homemade anti-gay t-shirts (suggesting, of course, a Freudian defense mechanism for their own unconscious impulses).

But there was nothing like the events we’re currently reading and hearing about.

I might just stop reading the news, so that I can preserve my image of the college that I still love.

Uncategorized

“It Follows.” (It’s great!!)

1 Comment

[WARNING: THIS REVIEW CONTAINS MILD SPOILERS FOR “IT FOLLOWS” (2014).]

A smaller budget doesn’t hurt this great indie horror film; I’d give “It Follows” a 9 out of 10.

It’s smart, surreal, creepy and atmospheric, and it’s beautifully shot.  Maybe it has some similarities with “The Ring” series, and also the little known excellent horror film, “From Within” (2008), but it’s still darkly creative and original.

It’s damn scary too — it’s terrific what this film accomplished with what looks like minimal CGI.  For some reason, a certain shot of a rooftop really got under my skin.  So, too, did a sequence depicting friends unable to warn a major character, because they’re unable to see “It” approach.

I have always had a weird thing about dopplegangers.  Other people hate clowns; I get creeped out by shapeshifters.  I’m frightened by any monster that can masquerade as allies or loved ones.  It’s part of the reason that the Alien Bounty Hunter worked so well for me as an antagonist on “The X Files” (1993), and why the T-1000 scared me in “Terminator 2: Judgement Day” (1991).  Even Mystique, “The X-Men” franchise’s anti-hero, could be a little unsettling every once in a while.  (An attack on Wolverine BY Wolverine?  Leaving his confused teammates unable to help?  That’s a little creepy.)

There are a bunch of themes served up by “It Follows” that you could walk away discussing with your friends; online critics are quick to point out sexually transmitted disease.  (A little on the nose, don’t you think?)  They also pointed out mortality — this was something that I actually missed, despite the fact that it was helpfully hinted at by one character who periodically reads Dostoyevsky aloud.

I personally thought the film tapped into a bunch of sexual taboos and anxieties — especially incest.  Consider the conversation about one character kissing a sibling, a face we see in a framed photograph toward the end, and the way “It” attacks another major character.  I also saw victimization — as with “The Ring,” the victims of the monster here are presented  with a tremendous moral quandary about how they might save themselves or at least forestall an attack.

Is water a motif?  Much screen time is devoted to characters entering pools or the ocean; one person also begs for water during an attack.

And what about wealth?  Much seems to be suggested by characters traveling from an affluent neighborhood to a poor one.  And all those sweeping shots (and excellent long tracking shots) of the protagonists’ beautiful neighborhood really stayed with me.  I kept thinking about how much I’d like to live there.

I’d love to know more about the origin and modus operandi of “It.”  There is a sequel planned, according to Wikipedia; that’s one of its possible plots.

This is a terrific scary movie!  Watch it tonight!

it-follows-main

Uncategorized

A short review of “Insidious: Chapter 2” (2013).

1 Comment

It’s garish, it’s over the top, and it’s muddled — the kind of film that begs to be lampooned by “South Park” or “Family Guy.”  For much of its running length, it’s largely a retread of its predecessor.  Yet “Insidious: Chapter 2” (2013) still manages to be a good horror movie.  I’d give it an 8 out of 10.

It’s pretty damn scary.  Its saving graces, I think, are slick directing, a fast pace, and an effective horde of screaming, shrieking ghosties.  (White-faced Screaming Abusive Mama Ghost needs to CHILLAX.)  If a fright flick makes you jump a bunch of times (and during the daytime!), then you know it’s a decent fright flick, right?

Patrick Wilson shines.  But the talented Rose Byrne does little in this film beyond running around with a terrified expression on her face.  (It’s the screenwriter’s fault, not hers.)  You see that face she’s making in the movie poster?  That’s her performance throughout almost the whole movie.

Did anyone notice that “Specs” is Leigh Whannell, one of the initial two unfortunates in “SAW” (2004)?  (He’s also the screenwriter for both films.)

This was a good horror movie.  If you want a scare before bedtime, see it.

MV5BMTg0OTA5ODIxNF5BMl5BanBnXkFtZTcwNTUzNDg4OQ@@._V1_

Uncategorized

WHAT … is that horrible TASTE in my mouth?

Leave a comment

Thomas Jefferson once wrote that “The price of freedom is eternal vigilance.” And here is the proof — enemies of basic Constitutional freedoms can arise from anywhere in the political spectrum.

This is why I get so angry when people tell me that they don’t know what the First Amendment is. It happened all the time in New York. And ignorance of our key rights leads inevitably to the disappearance of those rights. It is precisely how civil liberties are eroded.

Yes, I am aware of certain limits on speech and press, such as that which incites violence, causes a dangerous panic (“falsely yelling fire in a crowded movie theater”), constitutes slander or libel, or violates copyright or intellectual property rights.

Still, reading the words “free speech limits” makes me feel like I just swallowed a spoonful of dog shit.

Thank you, Megyn Kelly. You handled this exchange perfectly. And you wonderfully articulated your point about how the most reprehensible examples of speech paradoxically need the most protection.

Uncategorized

“Song of the Master and Boatswain,” by W. H. Auden

Leave a comment

“Song of the Master and Boatswain,” by W. H. Auden

(a selection from “The Sea and the Mirror”)

At Dirty Dick’s and Sloppy Joe’s
We drank our liquor straight,
Some went upstairs with Margery,
And some, alas, with Kate;
And two by two like cat and mouse
The homeless played at keeping house.

There Wealthy Meg, the Sailor’s Friend,
And Marion, cow-eyed,
Opened their arms to me but I
Refused to step inside;
I was not looking for a cage
In which to mope my old age.

The nightingales are sobbing in
The orchards of our mothers,
And hearts that we broke long ago
Have long been breaking others;
Tears are round, the sea is deep:
Roll them overboard and sleep.

Uncategorized

A review of “Tomorrow When the War Began” (2012)

3 Comments

Sigh. “Tomorrow When the War Began” (2012) looked SO promising – like an Australian version of “Red Dawn” (1984). Is there any movie more badass than “Red Dawn?” Is there any nation more badass than Australia?

Instead, this was like “Red Dawn Lite.” Should we call it “Pink Dawn?” No … that sounds like Gay rights activists invading the Bible Belt. Not that there’s anything wrong with that.  They’d get their First and Ninth Amendment Rights, along with the equal protection under the law that they deserve under the 14th Amendment.

Okay, I’m meandering. That’s because this film was so lackluster, it’s not even terribly fun to write about. Don’t get me wrong – this wasn’t a poorly made film. It was well written and directed, with promising young actors. It had great characters too – particularly the goofy guy who becomes a responsible leader. Parts of it were quite funny and it usually held my interest.

But this just wasn’t what I was hoping for – a visceral foreign invasion thriller. It’s obviously a tween movie – like “Red Dawn” given “The Hunger Games” treatment. Most of this film’s screen time is devoted to character development, including (of course) at least one unlikely teen romance. The nameless invaders seem to get less screen time (or attention from the characters) than a fun overnight camping trip that the teen heroes undertake.

Seriously. More script and plotting are devoted to their camping trip than to the armies invading their country. The (presumably North Korean) invaders must be the shyest opposing force ever – for much of the movie, we hardly see them. Are they embarrassed because their helmets make them look like those guys who fire the Death Star superweapon?

I’d give this movie a 6 out of 10.

p8605167_p_v7_aa

Uncategorized

I thought of a “Walking Dead” joke.

Leave a comment

What do you call a tall, lanky, jive-talkin’ zombie who sashays up to Rick and a says “Dyno-MITE!!!?”

J.J. Walker.

jj_walker

Uncategorized

Some Elbow Room

Leave a comment

This essay was written by a woman who I am proud to call a friend and a former classmate. Enjoy “Some Elbow Room,” by Anna Marie Martin.

Nurse Your Favorite Heresies in Whispers