Tag Archives: 24

A quick review of “Re-Kill” (2015)

I want to give “Re-Kill” (2015) more than a 5 out of 10 rating.  I do.  It’s an ambitious post-apocalyptic independent zombie film that earnestly and unpretentiously tries to give fans of the subgenre everything they’re asking for: great action, decent makeup effects, gore, good scares and lots of creative world-building, all culminating in a nifty little sci-fi subplot that isn’t stupid and isn’t too forced.

There’s a wealth of fun ideas here — the original story was obviously developed by people with a love for zombie tales.  We follow a “COPS”-style reality-TV program documenting a”Re-Kill” unit, a squad of specially trained commandos who repel brushfire outbreaks during a global, stalemated war between the living and the dead.  They “rekill” the “re-ans,” this universe’s slang for re-animated dead.

We see the entire program, complete with commercials from this fictional world: PSA’s to encourage people to have sex (in order to repopulate the world), and drug companies opportunistically pushing drugs for PTSD and depression.  My favorite was an ad for a Desert Eagle sidearm marketed to protective mothers, “for the children.”  We get wicked-cool peeks into a fairly detailed fictional world, including the activities of the police, the military, the media and civilians.

This would have made a fine book series, in the manner of Max Brooks’ “World War Z.”  Or it would make a terrific TV series … like a far faster paced and more expansive equivalent of “The Walking Dead.”

Tragically, though, this movie’s execution is too often lacking.  The acting is sometimes poor (but not from the always awesome Roger Cross, who you and I know as Curtis Manning from “24.”)  The script has problems.  And worst of all is the absolutely unnecessary shaky-cam directing.  This movie could have been a fantastic action-horror flick … if only we were able to see the action a little better.  The style of shooting here was a disastrous creative decision.

Oh, well.  It’s still a fun watch for hardcore zombie fans.

 

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“Fright Night 2” was an average night.

I submit that the direct-to-video “Fright Night 2” (2013) is the paragon of average horror movies.  It is neither great nor terrible.  You don’t immediately call your friends to recommend it, but you don’t bemoan its $1 rental price at Redbox either.  I’d give it a 6 out of 10.

The movie suffers greatly from an insufferably irritating iteration of protagonist Charlie Brewster.  He’s uncharismatic in every scene, including those showing his weaselly entreaties to the girlfriend who left him after he cheated on her.  (He is played blandly by Will Payne; she is played rather well by Sacha Parkinson.)  Entirely absent is the charm and likable innocence that Anton Yelchin brought to the role in 2011’s “Fright Night.”  (Kyle Reese fought vampires in 2011, then aided John Connor in the future to fight terminators, evidently.)

The lackluster Charlie here is compensated for by a terrific villain.  Jaime Murray is a fantastic female equivalent of Dracula.  She’s a strong actress, she’s a quite tall brunette who looks the part, and she knows how to both sex it up and scare us.  I love her as a bad guy (gal).  I’d love to see her play a conspirator on one of the nerd community’s most anticipated upcoming revivals: “24” or “The X Files.”  I’m told she has a role on that … medieval show that people watch.  “Shame of Thrones?”  “Dame of Thrones?”  I’ve never seen an episode.

“Fright Night 2” benefits from Romania as a wonderful shooting location, and it’s captured nicely by the talented eye of director Eduardo Rodriguez.  What is the deal with average or mediocre horror films being filmed on location in Romania?  Is it just really cheap to shoot there, like Prague?

Anyway, this movie’s title is a misnomer.  This movie isn’t a sequel to the terrific 2011 film.  It is actually a remake — we again meet Charlie Brewster and Peter Vincent (the very cool Sean Power) for the first time.  It’s confusing.  I’m guessing that this was a rejected script for the 2011 film that they decided to shoot anyway?

And here is my requisite exposition to silence the pedants in advance — of course we are all aware that this is a “remake of a remake.”  The 2011 film is a nice update of the 80’s classic.  (And wasn’t that fun flick the talk of the neighborhood back in the day?)

Sooooo, seeing how average this film was, I really can’t recommend that you ether watch it or skip it.  I guess I can just offer a neutral “hmm.”  I’d suggest that it is acceptable fare if you’re an especially ardent vampire movie fan who has already viewed the classics that are easily available.

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DAMN IT, this is good idea!

Soooooo.  Yesterday’s July 4th marked America’s 239th birthday … next year will be its 240th.  That’s 240 years.  Or 24 decades.

THIS WILL BE NEXT YEAR’S NATIONAL THEME SONG:

I propose that every American citizen endeavor to kill or capture at least one terrorist on July 4th of 2016.  In the event of failing this objective, he or she will be responsible for yelling “DAMN IT!!!” at least five times over the course of the day.

Bucket List Addition: Mandy, the Boba Fett of “24”

1)  Find “24” actress Mia Kirshner’s home address.

2) Show up outside her home one evening holding a boombox overhead, like that kid in that John Hughes movie.  (I don’t watch them.)

3)  Play Barry Manilow’s “Mandy” for her, thus winning her affections.

(I love this actress and character so much.  Mandy is the Boba Fett of the “24” universe.  The character of Ari Kirshner in my novel is named after the actress.  I so want her to reappear in Season 9.)

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Spy vs. Spy (DAMMIT!)

Remember that friend in the intelligence community who I turned on to “24?”  He’s hooked.  He did at least half of Season 1 yesterday.

Spy Guy via text: “this wasn’t the right show to watch when I have things to do!!”

But it got funner when he “dammitted” me: “DAMMIT DUDE I NEED TO TURN THIS OFF.”  (Because spies have an abhorrence for commas.)

Wouldn’t it be funny if an intelligence professional were late for work because he stayed up watching “24?”  I’m pretty sure that’s the definition of irony.

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